Some people say I’m courageous.

Some admire my confidence.
Some days I’m really proud of myself for all that.
But on days I’m true to myself, 
I know I’m anything but those.
Being courageous and confident are what I want to be,
or at least what I want to be seen as.
I think I succeed in looking them both cause
I don’t get how are yous as often as I would like, or at all.
The 12 YO would go blabbering about how I hide all my
sorrows and I’m putting up a mask and a fake smile to 
stay strong. 
The 21YO (notsohappybirthdaytome) think my smiles are genuine
and masks are … masks are part of you, everyone have multiple
masks.
Maybe that’s why I’m confused. I am. 
I’m sure I need a little more courage though. 
I’m pretty lost. 
I like to get lost don’t I. 
Getting lost gives you the opportunities to find 
paths and places you’ll never find if you don’t get lost.
Getting lost brings you to places you didn’t know you
need to be there until you’re there.
Uh fuck.

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